Monday, January 12, 2009

Dear Mr Rude Dude......



Dear Rude-Driver-Dude in the maroon beater Nissan two wheel drive tuck with UT plate 211 YMH,

Really?! Just who do you think you are?! Are you so much more important than the rest of us that you must zig/zag through lanes of traffic and cut off as many people as possible?!

Did you gain some sort of sick satisfaction when you cut RIGHT in front of me, and then had to hit your brake, thus forcing me to slam on my brakes, THUS, sending my bowl of corn pops all over my truck? HUH?! Now, I’m a believer in the 10 second rule, but not in the car. GREAT! NOW how am I supposed to correctly calculate the calories in the bowl of cereal when I don’t know exactly HOW MANY SPILLED!! And since they are coated with a nice sweetness something or other, that will make for super fun cleaning up. Thanks. Lucky for you, I had just gotten off my cell phone. If you had interrupted my conversation, I would have had to REALLY lay on the horn.

Is your job so important that it necessitates such erratic driving behavior? Are you a doctor that is rushing to deliver a baby, save a child or perform some sort of emergency surgery? Not with that POS you were driving.

Are you a VIP construction worker on an extremely important project downtown that requires your expertise with the crane? No, even Juan and Pedro down here at the Downtown Rising project are polite and kind.

WAIT! I figured it out! You have been out of smokes, beer and money since early yesterday afternoon. You were rushing to pick up your unemployment check so you could cash it, get your Natty Tall Boys, Camel menthol's and settle in for the day watching your cousins on Jerry Springer.

Well, just keep this in mind next time rude dude, waving your fat man hand in disgust at the rest of us who happen to be in your way, will NOT get.you.there.faster.

Sincerely,

The pissed off lady in the bad A pathfinder whose dirty looks WERE directed at you

16 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Remind me not to drive anywhere near you in the mornings. I mean, I'm sure you're a perfectly attentive driver, eating your cereal and talking on your cell and everything, but you know. Just in case.

Martha H. said...

I *heart* rude drivers. And peeps that text while driving. My fav.

Sher said...

Reminds me of the chic on Saturday that almost side swiped me while drifting into my lane. I looked over and sure nuff, she was texting, didn't even look up as she whizzed by.
Crazy lady.

Erin said...

Apparently since it was a beater truck he thought he was invincible. People like that make me cranky.

::Jan:: said...

Can I make copies of this letter and hand them out. I see more rude dudes than I care to anymore. I do think they just want to have the road to themselves. I don't get it. Sorry your had to encounter such rudeness. But it was a good laugh of a letter though.

tammy said...

There are rude drivers everywhere, but there seem to be an overload of them in UT. Which makes no sense since it is the land of milk and honey.

MiaKatia said...

Rude drivers give me stress and anxiety... I loath driving in traffic.

Denise said...

Corn pops....stuck to carpet. Ugh. What a horrible thought. I think you should have bumped his POS, just to give him a wake up call.

Rude-Driver-Dude 211 YMH said...

Yes M'am, I does gets me sum enjoyment from tryin' to run y'all off the road. If it makes ya feel any better, I spilled my beer.

nikkicrumpet said...

And the funniest part is...after all that zig zagging and running people off the road...they get off the exit 3 seconds in front of you. I'm sure it was worth saving those 3 seconds.

Motherboard said...

You must be WAY talented to be able to eat your cold cereal WHILE driving! Wow. Talk about mad skills...


I hate rude drivers. They are my biggest pet peeve... and UT has WAY too many of them!

tiburon said...

Do you want me to have him voted off the island?

Vanessa said...

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!! Watching his cousins on Jerry Springer. I hope you flipped him the bird!

Natalie said...

Hey - was this the road rage incident mentioned in the news today???

CJ, the Purple Diva said...

This was sad that it happened...but HYSTERICAL how you wrote it!

I'm laughging at:

The pissed off lady in the bad A pathfinder whose dirty looks WERE directed at you

Karen said...

This is reason 92 of why I take the bus. The bus driver gets to deal with the psycho drivers. I get to listen to music, books or just chat it us with the other non-stressed out peeps on the bus.