Friday, October 30, 2009

Question of the day....?

Have you ever had to pee really, really, REALLY bad, and you race to the bathroom, shut the door, whip down your pants, finally get situated and it comes so fast that you pee sideways?

Ummm, yeah, me neither.......I was just wondering.

Slang Gang Word of the Day

October 30: mantrum

when a grown man throws a tantrum when he can't have his way.

Rick had a mantrum when he found out he couldn't have McDonald's for dinner

** I don't believe that any commentary from me is necessary. Begin to incorporate this immediately.**

Funny Bone Friday - Things I may have heard, or said, or just thought in my head

"Do you have special pricing for those who can afford it, but just don't want to?"

"I don't have any pants on. How can I help you?"

"That list I keep? The one of people that I would donate a kidney to if needed? Yeah - you're OFF IT!"

"Who is Paco and why is he peeing on the dock?"

How come everyone gets a valium but me?

"Oh good, you got the kind that won't stick to my dentures"

"That was prolly the funnest MRI I've ever had."

"I do love me a good tingle"

Did he just tell his mom 'tough tit's?

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Question of the day....?

Imma axe you somthin (yeah I said AXE not ask)

Let's say that hypothetically you worked in the health care industry. Albeit, not in direct patient care, but in the industry.
You are surrounded by very smart, very intelligent, very educated people. You're not one of them, by the way, you're still trying to figure out how you landed here 11 years ago, but whatever, back to the situation at hand.

There are signs posted all over the restroom reminding everyone to wash their hands. There is even a sign with pictures to show one how if one doesn't know. Signs that say PLEASE WASH YOUR HANDS. You can't miss them really.

And let's say, again hypothetically speaking, that you and several of your co-workers have witnessed another employee who works on the same floor exit the restroom, after leaving a stall, after obviously doing her potty business, and NOT.WASH.HER.HANDS.

This disgusting event has been witnessed several times. On one occasion, the non-hand-washer used the sink to brush her teeth instead. With her unwashed hands.
Another time, she was observed making coffee. Good thing that you don't drink coffee, because that would just make you throw up. Hypothetically speaking of course.

So my question is trifold:

1. Do you continue to do nothing except gossip about it behind her back. But is it really gossip when you don't even know who she is? You don't know her name or even where on the floor she sits. So that's not really gossip right?

2. Anonymously report her to the employee health nurse so that they will speak to her and let her know that her behavior is not only inappropriate, but downright disgusting and is somehow a violation of some policy we have written somewhere.


3. Do you grow a pair and tell her to her face as she walks right the sinks, that she should stop and wash her hands. Do you throw in the word dumbass for good measure?

Discuss....please advise. Because hypothetically speaking, I might have to start from a different office every single day just to avoid the non-hand washer.

Thankful Thursday - Warning....Political rant involved

I am thankful for the sacred privilege of free speech. However, this bothers me

That's my flag. I feel like someone graffiti tagged my home.

I am thankful for those who are serving to protect our country and our freedoms. I'm trying to understand why Obama is still holding off? His top general has been asking for months and yet he is still thinking about it? If the top general, who by the way was CHOSEN by BO, and who is consulted constantly by war strategists, outlines a plan for the current conflict, why does the commander-in-chief balk at his recommendations? What message does this send those hard working men and women who daily place themselves in harms way for us and for freedom?

I am extremely thankful for my health care coverage. I have worked hard the past several years to get my cholesterol levels and other measurable health numbers to a better than average healthy status. Therefore, I pay accordingly. I am thankful that I have some CONTROL over which doctors I see and when I can see them. I am thankful that I have been, in a sense, rewarded for healthy living. However, this plan not just frightens me, but angers me.
Closed doors? How does she expect it is going to be paid for? Likely by us hard working Americans that do everything we possibly can to save, live within our means, pay our taxes and overall play by the rules. I donate to charity on a monthly basis and assist and aid where and when I can. But I choose. I do not want to have myself taxed out the wazoo so that the government can decide who gets the assistance. Being fundamentally opposed to abortion, I also don't think I should have to pay for it. If I earn my money, don't I get a say as to what I do with it?

I'm thankful that I have a personal blog that I can vent on about these things from time to time.

What are you thankful for today?

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Me likey prizey's

Lately it seems that I have been on the receiving end of a lot of kindness. Both in word, deed and product!

Earlier this week, my MIL and two SIL's stopped by with some lovely roses and a nice card for Tuffy. They were so thoughtful about our very awful week last week.

That same night, BFF B's came over with two bags of "comfort food". Diet coke, Mtn Dew, popcorn, ding dongs, fruit gushers, peanut butter m&m's, and the movie The Proposal. They knew just what to deliver didn't they?

I wish I would have thought to grab my camera that night!

Today...... I walked into Shark's house and was bestowed with this:

I CAN.NOT wait to give this a whirl. I heard about this product from Miss Martie, and knew that I NEEDED it. Tiburon did not disappoint. I promised her that I would think of her when I slathered it all over and reveled in it's minty magic. Um. Wow. Does that make anyone else feel slightly uncomfortable?
Thank you my little angel shark friend!

And then, I came home to a package sitting on the counter. I ripped that sucker open as fast as I could and found these:
I mentioned to Cherie how much I liked a plate I had seen in one of her pictures and where could I find one. Next thing you know, she kindly makes (yes you read that right - MAKES) one and sends it my way, along with the softest socks in the world and a friendly card. Seriously, bloggy friends are the best. Thank you dear Cherie, and seriously, if your not already reading her? Go to! She's fantastic!
I hope we get a chance to meet IRL. I promise I'm not too scary....

Red Robin - good food and so.much.more - Nancy you ROCK!

For our little soiree luncheon today, we went to the Red Robin in the District.
Shark has already touted it's glories so I knew we wouldn't be disappointed.

I was especially excited to know that I could get all the nutritional information (translate - calorie counts) on line. I HATE restaurants that won't do that, but that's a post for another day.

So there we are at the Red Robin, having our delightful Red Robin food, when our server spills my ranch dressing down the front of herself. I made a joke that it was better on her than me since I was in game uniform. She quickly pointed out another server and called her over.

Seems Nancy is a bit of a die hard Yankees fan too. Maybe.....MAYBE more than me? I'm not sure. It's a close one. But when I heard she had a tat? I begged for a picture. (I have no shame, remember?)

Thus I present to you, the most awesome, best taste in baseball, Red Robin server EVAH....... Nancy!

(what is that look on my face?)

She told me she is getting another one across her shoulders in a month or two. Oh yes, Nancy, I will be back!!

A very bloggy luncheon

Okay, I have been MORE than excited to me the Divine Miss Plain Jame. I found her blog or she found me, I can't remember which, but long story short, I quickly became a fan of hers.

As conversations go on, we discover we don't live that far apart and she suggested that maybe she, me and the Shark could have a little get together. HECK YEAH! We had it all planned for last week and then, well, my misadventure shut that plan down.

Not to be deterred, we planned it again for today. PREVAIL!!!

As luck would have it, we got there at exactly the same time, walked into the restaurant together and instant fun!

First let me say....I suck at bloggy get togethers. I ALWAYS FORGET PRIZES!!!!! I'm always the schmuck who forgets to bring a little sumpin,sumpin for my new IRL friend. Today was no different

Now, NGL - she was a little on the quiet side, but I think that while I scare most people all by myself, the combination of me with the Shark would make anyone cringe with anxiety.

Who am I kidding? We cringe ourselves sometimes!

We had a delightful lunch, a great time talking and promises (TO BE KEPT) of a GNO with no kids! Not that it's a problem for me, but the two of them would like to relax I'm sure.

So thank you Plain Jame and Shark for a fun, laugh filled lunch!

Slang Gang Word of the Day - Two-fer special

October 26: Dank

Also an expression requently used by stoners and hippies for something of high quality.

That burritos was dank, man.
or... Those burritos were the dankness

**I'm no stoner or hippie, but I think the word shall be added to my own vocabulary. Those ding dongs were the dankness. Yep, that was easy.**

October 28: Northwest Nap

A very deep sleep where you are unable to hear telephones, text messages, and even the Air Force.

Named to honor the two fine pilots from Northwest Airlines and their little "in flight snooze"

"Dude, I was so tired yesterday afternoon, I took a Northwest Nap. My girl called me 15 times and I didn't hear a thing"

**My nightly slumber could be considered a Northwest Nap. Sorry Amber**

Monday, October 26, 2009

Slang Gang Word of the Day

October 25: bullshine

Work-safe and broadcast-safe synonym of bullshit.

Person 1: "Have you heard about that guy who says he made 100 bucks overnight?"

Person 2: "Yeah, whatever, that's a load of 'bullshine'!"

**My new favorite word!**

Missionary Monday - update

Hey mom and dad, sorry that I am writing you guys so late. We actually went and played a b ball game with the kids in the ward and an investigator that we have called Diego. He is sooo awesome!! He will be baptized this next month. I really do appreciate the letters that you guys sent me, even though it waanst the best news.... I am sorry to hear that Kasey died, I really do feel sad. I was actaully looking really foward to seeing him again, but I guess that it is a lot better that his is not suffering right? That was really suprising about you being rushed to the ER mom, I hope that you still are doing okay and that it does NOT happen again! We are getting so much work done here in this sector, seriously, we are turning things around here. I try not to think aboout the time that I have left, but just to work work and work hard for the rest of my mish. I am so glad that we are doing great here. I will probably end my mish here. Sorry this letter is goin gto have to be short, we are kinda in a big hurry. I love you guys soooo much and thanks for all that you guys do! Have a great week!!!!

Elder Catmull

**That's it. THAT'S IT! A measly paragraph. Just cause he's busy doing the Lord's work and all......**

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Spiritual Sunday

Sometimes at church when you are busy trying to occupy a 2 year old whose only interest is in going to "cwass", it's hard to hunker down, feel the Spirit and be uplifted. When your heart is heavy with the knowledge of what must be done after church, it creates even more of a challenge. This is how I approached Sunday worship today.

We settled in our row and immediately the toys, books, and treats came out and the game began. I was pleasantly surprised at how well behaved Sissy was and how easily she was occupied with her bag of "busy" items.

After the Sacrament portion, we had a young man speak. He's a baseball player and I love him to death. His only fault is that he's a Red Sox fan. We've had "words" on more than one occasion. And chalking. And toilet papering. So, yes I might be guilty of trashing talking and "getting into it" with a 14 year old. But I seriously digress.

CC began his talk of course with some sports references and yes it grabbed my attention. He shared an experience in seminary where the instructor was discussing personal relationships with Jesus Christ. The teacher called on CC and asked him what he thought. He answered, "I was thinking, where I would put Jesus in my batting line up."

His response got some laughs from the congregation, but it certainly caused me to think for a minute. Considering how important a batting order is in relationship to the offense of a baseball team, it was clear that I would want my Savior batting clean up. Not lead off, even though He's a consistent hitter and will always get on base - clean up is the guy that is counted on every.single.time. He's your go-to guy.

I then began to think about my own personal relationship with Jesus Christ. He is my clean up hitter, do I let Him do His job? Or do I get in His way?

President Dieter Uchtdorf said, "Discipleship is not a spectator sport."

I came away more inspired. By a 14 year old. Who loves the Bo-Sox. Go figure.

Ode to our favorite Freakshow (as we affectionately called him)

Kasey Von Drake
10/30/03 - 10/25/09

Dear Kasey,
When I first held you as a few weeks old pup, you wrapped your paws around my arm and looked me square in the eye. I knew at that moment, you were the right dog for my boy.

Christmas morning, after trying to keep you quiet for hours in a basket in our room, we finally gave up, woke all the boys and you were presented to Tuffy. I'll never forget the look on his face as the realization set in that YOU belonged to him. Its etched in my mind forever.

We watched you over the next year grow to an absurdly large golden retriever. Your sheer mass scared people who didn't know you. You were often referred to as a horse. Yes, you were THAT big. You didn't know it though. You always saw yourself as a lap dog. Which is great except for visitors who aren't expecting it.

You could put you head right on the kitchen table, and don't even start me about when you would stand on your back paws and check out anything on the cupboards. We learned quickly to keep food safely stored out of reach.

Whenever it snowed, you were in pure heaven. You would run and quickly just lay and roll around in it. Thank goodness your fur was water resistant, and you dried off quickly. You loved the snow. You loved playing in the snow with Kodi, Jordan or anyone of the two-legged variety.

The mere mentioning of W.A.L.K (yes we would have to spell it) would send you into a tizzy of excitement. You were born to run. Run free, smelling everything, greeting everyone. You only tolerated the leash.

You perfected the art of escape. More fence boards were broken than I can count. You just wanted out to play. Twice we bailed you out of doggy jail. Twice you went to elementary school, and twice you went as far as the Junior high. You just wanted to play. The kids were there, you wanted in on the fun.

We have kind neighbors who, when you escaped, would grab you, take you to their homes(inside even), call us or if they could, just open the front door and put you back home. Speaking of doors, you learned how to open the doors with your mouth, we had to make sure the deadbolt was latched.

You needed to see outside at all times. The table in the living room? It used to be a nice wood table, but it soon became your means to the large window and the view outside. Hours you spent parked on that table just watching the world go by. You were a fixture for the neighbors as they drove by. If you could, you would have waved. You were regularly perched there when we would pull into the driveway which then prompted me to sing....."How much is that doggy in the window....."

You loved everyone. You had no biases of any kind. You saw everyone as the same. Someone to play with, pet you, love you, and be your friend. We could learn alot from your example of open acceptance.

That might have been why you were often submissive, even to the point of timid and scared. Thunder? Beeping noises? Any usual sound? You made your way to the bathtub. We would laugh at how easily you were scared, but as you grew older it only became worse. Days with fireworks were pure hell for you. We spent a lot of time soothing you.

We watched as Kodi early in your life, carefully taught you the art of playing growly. It amused us to no end. The two of you were quite a pair rolling on the ground, growling and mouthing at each other. You brought youth to her old age and gave her so much happiness in her last days.

When we lost Kodi, you were desolate. Your pal was gone. You were lonely. When Jordan joined the family, you got your spark back. You then carefully passed on the art of playing growly. You accepted her, loved her and taught her the joy of stealing bread.

I will never forget when I would come home from work, find an empty bread sack, hotdog bun bag or even the remnants of a hamburger bun bag. All I had to do was look at you and ask if you did it. You immediately hung your head, and walked to the back door to be put out. You just couldn't help yourself when it came to bread.

Remember that time you ate a whole pan of brownies? We had just baked a batch and they were cooling on the stove. The home teachers came over with a batch so we put that up out of reach on the counter, not thinking about the ones on the stove. By the time the HT's left, you had completely eaten the entire pan that was cooling on the stove. That earned you the nickname of iron stomach. You ate all kinds of weird crap and rarely got sick from it.

Your fur was so soft. While we kept you shaved most of the time to reduce the shedding, you stil were soft. Your ears, your neck and you chin and face were favorite spots to caress, pet and rub. It wasn't all for you, you know. Petting you was soothing to us as well. Many a time, I would see someone (Tuffy) just mindlessly caressing your ears just to feel good.

You were the ultimate pack animal. You loved, nay, CRAVED being with the family. You liked everyone home and in their places. You were truly, a part of the family. You loved going places, being with us and being a part of our activities. You sat through many a ball game, you tolerated a lot of "rides" from Sissy, you even stepped up and mothered those darling puppies a year ago.

This summer was the best cabin trip ever. You just had those tumors diagnosed, we weren't sure what lied ahead and was hoping that if this was your last time there, it would be your best. It was. Words cannot even describe your happiness there.

This last week has been hard. We noticed you weren't yourself. Then we saw you stopped eating. A trip to the vet and several tests later, didn't give us a lot of options. It was hard to see you this way. Barely moving. Not eating, not drinking. Seeking solitary time. We watched our fun-loving, eager to play friend become a shell. We knew your suffering needed to end, and we did what we thought was best.

It's nice to think of you now. I believe you were met by Kodi and are now playing growly with her again. You are chasing birds, chickens and ducks, and FINALLY running as free as you wish. There are no big windows, no fences, no leashes to be in your way. There are streams to splash in, lakes to swim, and an endless supply of trees to sniff. You are happy.

You were a beloved member of our family. You are missed already. There is a void that can't be filled, but we'll get through it. Thus is the circle of life. Some say, "I'll never have a dog, for this very reason. They die and it's too hard."

Yes it's hard, but if we chose to skip out on the adventure of Kasey, we would have missed 6 years of fun, aggravation, laughter, frustration, pure joy and lessons learned that come with a pet who provides unconditional love.

My boy Tuffy? He's a better person because of the lessons learned from his dog. And for that, dear Freakshow Kasey, I thank you.


Alpha Female.

PS. (Dont forget that Marley and Me could have been written about you. That makes you a star in my book and you can click here for more funny Kasey stories)

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Whoops.....brain camp

I looked outside this morning and for a moment, thought I liked fall.......

and then I walked out the door and remembered. I don't.

Slang Gang Word of the Day - Two-fer special

October 23: last texter

That friend that always sends you a meaningless text after the obvious end of a text conversation, just to get the last text. They do this while totally oblivious to their uncontrollable habit.

Gosh, Jan is SUCH a last texter it drives me crazy. The other day, she sent me a text "K" back after I texted her "don't text me, in a meeting." So then I had to dig out my phone again to clear it so it wouldn't keep vibrating for the rest of the meeting!

**So annoying! Right? Really! K.....**

October 24: people voice

A people voice is the voice that someone uses when talking to people who aren't their friends. This voice is automatically happy, nicer and sweeter than their normal voice. It is also often more high pitched. This is often the voice people use when answering a telephone or when working in retail. Similiar to the girlfriend voice.

She so used her people voice when she was talking to that customer over there. Did you hear how sweet she was? She never sounds like that normally!

**Also known as the telephone voice. As in you are SCREAMING at your children and the phone rings. Your voice instantly changes to sweet and sugary.**

Friday, October 23, 2009

Funny Bone Friday - Things I may have heard, or said, or just thought in my head

"He's Elmer Fudd 'in it."

"Did you say vampire or MANpire?"

"We'll just call you Senor Sleuthy Pants"

"I was running the whole load on my own"

"I'm gonna dumb you down like nobody's business"

"I tell ya, I'm an easy poke"

"These are so tight, they are sucking my eyeballs from their very sockets!"

Thursday, October 22, 2009

5 People I Would Love To Be Trapped In An Elevator With

Okay so two of my FAVORITE bloggers (Shark and Plain Jame) have posted this game and I was challenged to play along.

I've been thinking this over, cuz there are A LOT of fascinating people that if I had to get stuck in an elevator, which would by the way cause me serious anxiety - perhaps unto death, I would at least like to spend some time with them.

1. My Splenda Daddy Cheesy I know, but really he was the first thing to come to my mind. He's my other half for crying out loud! What if I never get out of the elevator? What if I am in the elevator A LONG TIME???? I need and want my better and much more patient, calming half to be there. Besides we seem to amuse ourselves to no end. We make each other laugh and think we are oh so funny all the time. Much to the chagrin of Tuffy. But that is a whole 'nother post!

2. Derek JeterThe dude is an AMAZING ball player. Have you seen some of his moves? I would love to hear his story from his own mouth. I want to know how he maintains such a fairly private live amongst the chaos that many of his teammates seem to cause. I want to just see if he is that kind, calm and cool in real life. And when I piddle with excitement, at least Splenda will be there to wrap his jacket around me to hide my embarrassment.

3. Elvis Presley. Not bloated, drug hazed, glitter jump suit Elvis. I want to talk with thisyoung, handsome, incredibly talented Elvis. The one whose voice is A-MAZE-ING. I really thought as a very young girl that my dad WAS Elvis. We listened to him alot. I want to hear his voice in person. And yes, I realize that Elvis is dead, but there were no rules attached as to whether or not the persons had to be living. And since this is my blog and my turn at the game, I can do whatever I want. So, I would like to visit with the young looking one, but get his whole life story. What happened? What went so terribly wrong with such a talented young man? And he could just sing for awhile and everyone else in the elevator would be as happy as me.

4. Gonna need my staples. Yes, you know it! The vending machine dudes!
Gonna need the beverage pimp as well as the snack machine guy. They can be one and the same, but he needs be on the elevator with dollies of both on board. Sweet, salty and the ever beloved brown bubbles. 'Nuff said.

5. And now my final choice. Since Splenda is there with me, trying to keep me in check, apologizing for my behavior and attempting to spare me further humiliation, I felt it only fair to ask him.
"Splenda," I said, "If you were stuck on an elevator who is the one person you'd want to be stuck with?"
His response?
"The elevator repair man."

He's a dreamer that one, isn't he?

How about you? Feel free to play! I might have to have a round 2 or so.....

Happy Mother's day - in October

On the riverbank.....

In the Arctic...

In India...

In Africa...

In the Arctic...

In Africa...

in Wal-Mart...

Brings a warm, soft feeling to your motherly heart doesn't it?

(thanks for the fun email TR)

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


I am, like WAY behind on my reader, and there are like fifty million of them and I WILL READ THEM ALL, just give me a little time.

Wednesday Wrandom Wrambling's - Medical style - 'cause that's how I'm rollin.....

I think the picture says it all. Medicated and motivated. When was I ever NOT medicated? I can't remember a time. Maybe I should give it a try? Nah.......

Yeah, so a little scare yesterday. See I've been having these 'Sympathetic Lumbar Nerve' blocks. They inject some sort of anesthesia or something like that into the nerve in my left lumbar into a sympathetic nerve that carries messages from the brain to the nerves in that leg. It is to help the CRPS. I went in yesterday for my third block, and the bottom fell out. I felt as she was doing it that something didn't feel right. I said something. She said everything was fine. I then felt a sharp pain straight down that leg. I told her. This had never happened before. She assured me things were okay.

I get moved to post op and all hell breaks loose. I KNOW something is wrong, I tell them, I describe what is happening. They think it's because I am dehydrated and low blood sugar. They make me drink juice (HELLO!!! I don't DRINK LIQUID CALORIES!!), they monitor blood pressure and heart rate. My heart rate was in the 50's and even dipped below. BP is fine but I feel like I can't swallow, I am freezing cold and now all my muscles from head to toe have started spasming. I could give a tourette's patient a run for their money on the spasms.

I'm pretty sure I am gonna die, I am kinda aware of what is going on, but kind outta my body. I can hear them and they are trying to get my temperature and finally I hear someone say we better call an ambulance.

So the ambulance comes. I'm not thrilled since they gotta ask me a whole lot of questions and I'm busy trying not to die. My blood sugar was 110, I already had two liters of fluid and my spams are outta control. Preeeeetttty sure it's not because of low blood sugar or dehydration. Something went wrong with that block, I felt it and my body was now reacting.

Just a side note to emt's who work the ambulance shift? People on the gurneys ARE NOT DEAD! I might have looked dead, but I was still alive! Flinging me up and down to get me in the elevator was a little uncalled for. Just saying.......

I get to IMC and I know that I am not going to die now. They won't let me. They have the equipment, the doctors, the technology to fix whatever the crap is wrong with me. I get into a room, another IV placed, monitors, more questions. Can't you people see I'm freaking spasming like no other? MAKE IT STOP! I am fricking FREEZING, make me warm, NOW. I know you have those in those warmer, oven thingies!!

I get settled and because of the jaw pain and some mild chest pain and my family history, well then for the love of all that's holy, we have to do an ENTIRE cardio work up. Does the term defense medicine mean anything to you? Sure as hell does to me and I don't blame them. With the litigious society we have, they can't NOT run those tests.

Of course all is normal. I am given some benadryl and steroids and told it is likely an allergic reaction to something with the block.

YA THINK????? Really now? Several hours later, couple grand in the bank and that's the best you can come up? Now, I'm no scientist, but I had no hives, no rash, my throat was NOT swollen. They even came to that conclusion. The problem swallowing was the sensation with my jaw. It wasn't typical anaphlayctic(sp?) shock. Instead I have the extreme cold and the muscle spasms and a weird weird feeling. Could that be, oh, I don't know TOXICITY REACTION?? Like maybe she missed the nerve and injected the anesthesia into my bloodstream? Yeah...that makes more sense. But, hey, I'm no doctor. Although I have stayed at a Holiday inn once.

And since the Benadryl, Steroids and sleep in the ER have now eased the spasms and I am now coherent and feeling like I can go home, well there is just one more thing. I need to do a cardio stress test. You know, just to rule out the final cardio work up factor. Um, let's see. I had a full cardio workup 2 years ago. Fine. Normal. A-OK. But again, still, what with my family history and all. You see, when I tell medical people that my father died of a heart attack at age 35, they freak out a little and it becomes overkill on the cardio workup's.

I went again this morning for an adenosine stress test. They inject nuclear tracers in through your heart and take a little looksie. Then they inject this medicine that tricks your heart into thinking it's exercise (since I can't run the treadmill with this effing stress fracture). Wow. That was fun. Can you say....weirdest sensation? Like I was sprinting the last K of a 10k but no leg burn. Very odd.
And, like we knew it would, it all turned out okey-dokey. However, the cardiologist had to have a serious talk about making sure that I stay followed up on. Yup. I know. I do.

So, here I am. Planning on the gym tomorrow. I lived for yet another day. I keep getting punched down and somehow keep coming through, for the better part, unscathed. I really am NOT a drama queen. I don't like this kind of attention. If I am being hysterically funny, then by ALL means, yeah, pay attention to me, but, I prefer not to have all this kind of action happening.

I started wondering when the bottom fell out. And I tracked it down. Right after Elder L left on his mission. Hmmmm..... can I hold him serving the Lord as responsible? Thoughts?........................... Okay, you're right. NO!!! We just need opposition in all things.

When does one get to yell uncle? And when does one get hear? Just wondering.....

And for the record? No, I am not going back to that doctor. Or that clinic. Ever. (except to get my medical records). She didn't even have the decency to call me back herself. And when I finally did get someone in her office? She AGAIN disputed the fact that it had anything to do with the block. Dumbass.

Wordless Wednesday

Tickle Me Pink Tuesday

I got nothun. Okay, um, I didn't die today. That tickles me pink.

details forthcoming and comments off

Monday, October 19, 2009

Monday Missionary Update

(old picture)

Hey mom and dad how are you guys doing??? Things are all going goodhere in the mish. I am glad that you guys got the plans!!! As for me I still dont know what is all going to go down. This week I had my second to last zone conference. It was really sad to think that the next time that we have zone conference I will be bearing my testimony. Oh i dont know if i told you guys that, but at the end of every conference the missionaries that are going home that transfer give thier last testimonies. So the next conference that we will have, I will be giving mine. Really sad.... We are having a lot of success in our sector with finding people and have a lot of people to teach. IF all goes well we should be having some baptisms soon! I am really getting used to the whole ZL thing. Its just like once you get the hang of it, its all good. I am sure also the time is flying by as fast as it is for me as it is for you guys huh?? I am really taking advantage of the time that I have left. I am really lucky though, I got a really good comp. that helps me out a lot. The missionaries in our zone are doing all right, we are trying to help them out to do better, but i guess that you cant take away the free agency that someone has right? Also this Friday we are going to have a meeting as Leaders within 4 zones and the typical interchanges with the missionaries. We are improving the sector a lot where we are working so I am feeling really great about that. It has its challanges but that is nothing that cant be overriden. I am glad that you are doing better mom. I was worried but I know that you will get a lot better soon. Oh and to answer your question dad about if I wanted to wait to help you with the bathroom so that I know how to do it and stuff that would be great. Of course, if it is something that you need to do right away and would be better if you did it right now, go ahead, but I dont have a problem at all waiting and doing it with ya, thatwould be really cool. Its too bad....just when I thought that the rain was done.....we got rain all this week :( oh well, I guess I am so used to it that it doesnt affect me too much haha. I love you guys sooo muhc and I miss you!!! Have a great week, tell griff and chris that I said HI!!!!!

Elder Catmull

** The countdown for me has begun.....**

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Spiritual Sunday..conference, death and finally a testimony.

Today was Regional Stake Conference for my worship service. And for those who don't know what I am talking about, we don't go eat steak, although that would make it a little more enticing. I like mine medium well....but I digress already. And this is a looooong post. Stay with me folks, while it may seem that I am rambling whilst medicated, I am clear as a bell on this one.
If you're interested in understanding more of the terms and such that I am going to be using today,You can learn more here........

As a member of this church:we meet twice a year as a Stake (group of wards in a regional area), and one of those times it is regional with many stakes in a designated geographical area.
Gosh, that seems like a lot of explaining.

Anyhoo, today was the one with 109 stakes from around the SL valley. all participating in the same meeting. Some were actually in the conference center, while the rest of us watched from a satellite broadcast at our Stake buildings.

NGL - Usually Stake Conference is kinda of a "pass" Sunday. I go fairly regularly, but I don't feel too bad if I just need to sleep and rest that particular Sunday.
This week, I really felt like I wanted to go. I made arrangements for C to come hang out with Sissy, sent Splenda over early to get soft seats in the chapel, and for some reason felt excited about attending. Weird, I know.

The first hour of the session was clearly devoted to inspiring us to attend the temple more often and become more of a temple worshiping people. I felt duly chastised since my temple attendance isn't the greatest. I formulated a plan that includes weekly attendance with Splenda. (I'll fill him in on that matter later.)

The last hour was 20 minutes of Elder Robert D Hales (an apostle) who not only bore a strong testimony, but taught some great principles that I needed to hear. The last 40 minutes was President Monsen's time. President Monsen is the man we see as not only the President of our church. But we view him as a prophet, seer and revelator. Some ask, why? I'll try to explain but I'm not going into all the specific doctrinal aspects, let me just tell you what I think.

I am a Christian. I believe in Jesus Christ. I believe Jesus Christ atoned for all mankind's sins and by making and receiving special ordinances and covenants, I can return to God with my family intact because of His atoning sacrifice. Of course, I must continually repent of my sins and keep trying to do the best I can.

Since I believe in Christ, and the New Testament explains his going's on while He lived including the organization of His church, it only makes sense to me that His same church would be in existence today. All his Apostles were killed off, so His Priesthood was lost. It makes sense to me that it would have to be restored and since there were prophets in old times (Noah, Moses), we would have prophets now, in the restored same gospel of Jesus Christ.
But now, I have gotten off topic. Again.

Let me tell you about President Thomas S. Monson

Many years ago, and for a very long time, President Monsen worked with Splenda's dad in the church publications department. I'll refer to Splenda's dad as RBC for the rest of the post. They became friends. RBC was a talkative type and would catch President Monsen's ear whenever possible. They became good enough friends that at one point, when one of Splenda's siblings was ill, President Monsen gave that child a blessing. Suffice it to say, he was beloved in Splenda's family.

When Splenda's dad suddenly became ill and the outlook was grim, Splenda's older brother called President Monsen's office and left a message requesting that RBC's name be put on the Apostles special prayer roll. He was assured it would. He also informed President Monsen's secretary of the severity of RBC's illness and asked that it be passed on to him.

Some days went by and we knew that Splenda's dad was not going to survive. It was now time for all the children to gather and to say their last goodbyes. Goodbyes that were whispered quietly into his ear as he lay motionless in a drug induced coma. Since we were assured he could still hear, that is how we would talk to him. It was a special time I will never forget.

Splenda's mom made the difficult choice to remove life support and let him pass. She chose June 27th. It's her birthday. Why that date you ask? Because it was also Joseph Smith's birthday and RBC always liked to make the connection. He loved the prophet Joseph and loved that his wife shared his birthday. Of course it made sense for June 27th.

As everyone gathered and was given instructions as to what would take place, the children were all led to a family waiting room. Grandma Joy stayed with RBC. Soft music was playing in his room. The siblings were all quietly talking, crying, and trying to process what was happening in another room.

I couldn't sit there any longer. I felt this overpowering need to sing. Sing hymns. And to sing in RBC's room with him. Not here in a cold family waiting room. I whispered to my SIL with whom I have sung before. I told her my feelings and though she was a little surprised at first, agreed to come back to his room and sing.

We entered to see his sweet wife stroking his face and rubbing his hands. A nurse was present to monitor all vitals and the machines were rolling. We could watch his heart beat and literally his body slow down.

We began to sing "I am a child of God". As we proceeded, Grandma Joy joined in. RBC's two daughters wandered in and joined. Splenda kept hovering in and out of the room. Wanting to be in there, but dreading the sound of a flat line.

Once done with that song, we moved onto "How great Thou Art" SIL and I had sung that in sacrament meeting in her ward, so we didn't need books for that one. We continued with different hymns or primary songs that we knew the words to.

At one point, another nurse entered the room to say there was a call for RBC, and could someone from the family please come and take it. SIL stepped out of the room and went to the nurses station to take the call.

The rest of us just waited quietly, no singing right now. Just the sounds of the machines and monitors. Even the nurse who watched everything was silent.

SIL came running into the room and got right down into RBC's ear. "Dad", she said, "President Monsen just called and wanted you to know that he is thinking of you and loves you."

In amazement, the rest of us watched as the monitor that displayed his heart rate, suddenly took a spike upwards. He had HEARD her and he was HAPPY!. His friend had called, expressed his love, and he knew it! His heart rate stayed up high for several minutes longer as we stood in awe. Then slowly, it descended again.

The rest of this particular story is to sacred to share, but let me testify that there is "another side" and that at times, the veil is very, very thin. The Spirit World is real. Of this I know.

Why do I tell this story? What does this have to do with anything that the post was originally about? Stake Conference, remember M-Cat, you were talking about Stake Conference........

Let me tie it all together with yet another story.......
A couple of years after Splenda's Dad passed, I happened to be in the same building, in the same room, about 10 feet away from President Monsen who was just sitting in a chair minding his own business. I desperately wanted to talk to him, but knew that since I was in a work capacity, that if I approached him, I could be immediately fired. I battled internally for about, oh, two seconds.

I walked up to him, extended my hand and introduced myself as the DIL of RBC. I asked him if he remembered RBC. A broad smile came to his face and he told me that of course he did. He invited me to sit down. I asked him if he remembered the day he called the hospital when RBC was passing. He did. I related to him what had happened in the room that day and shared my thankfulness for his timely call and the effect it had not only on RBC but the rest of us in the room. I told him how grateful I was that he had taken the time out of his busy schedule, and that he would call at that exact time.

He turned to me and looked me square in the eyes. He said, "I have learned over the years to never pass on inspiration. When the Spirit tells me to do something. I.Do.It."

He was then called away, but before he left, he shook my hand again, and I thanked him for his time with me that day and his words of wisdom. It was a sweet and awesome experience.

Fast forward several years. President Gordon B Hinckly, whom I LOVED like a grandpa, just as many members of our church did, passed away, and according to the process God has put in place, President Monsen became the president of the church and our living prophet.

Was it easy for me to accept this instantly? After my special experiences and everything? I have to say no. Sure, I accepted him as the president and prophet. I had no problem with it. I just hadn't felt the Spirit WITNESS it to me.

Today in Regional Stake Conference, my witness came. As he spoke, I thought back on RBC's life, about his working with Pres. Monsen, I thought of how proud and excited he would be to know that his friend was now the prophet! I thought back on that day, June 27th so many years ago, and that special phone call, and what it did for RBC, and remembered how I felt. Suddenly, it came. I looked back up to the big projection screen and looked into his eyes, just like I did before and I can now say, I. KNOW.

As our 6th article of faith states: "We believe in the same organization that existed in the primitive church, namely apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, evangelists and so forth."

As I stated above, logically it makes sense that there would be a prophet in the world today just as there were in Moses' time.

But today, I can say, I not just believe, but I KNOW. President Monsen is God's living prophet today. The Lord speaks to him just as he did to Moses. And, if I listen and obey, I too can know what the Lord has to say. Not just to me, quietly in a busy hall in an office, but for the whole world.

I have to say that in tumultuous times such as these, I am grateful for a living prophet.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

World Government?? Whiskey.Tango.Foxtrot!!

EG sent me this link.

I read it and was startled to say the least.

I snopes'd it. I cannot find any refute, or dismissal as untrue. Instead, snopes led me to other websites with the same information.

Read it and act if you feel so inclined....... I believe we are responsible and accountable for our actions and/or apathy.

And please....if someone finds reliable information to the contrary, please respectfully pass it on.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Funny Bone Friday - Things I may have heard, or said, or just thought in my head

"Once you get past his fartiness factor, he is a really nice guy."

"The keys are sticky, I HAVE to pound."

"Did he just SNIFF his bat?!"

"Karen's always the easy one."

"Look, it's porn at the Panda"

"I made a new friend in the time it took you to get there"

"We could have strapped that on the back and had it jerked by the time we got there"

"Your painful UTI, was my salvation"

"I thought for sure I was going to see puppy dog noses at any minute"

"I almost buried my face in your cleveland for safety."

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Thankful Thursday

I'm so excited and thankful that I am literally vibrating.......

Today. This morning. We finally got Elder L's FLIGHT ITINERARY!!!!! YAY! He will arrive in SLC on January 1, 2010. I am so thankful for that little email that completely made my day. My week. My month!

I am thankful for herI had to go to St George this week for training. Thankfully, I was able to cut a couple of the classes and make it a quick trip. However, with the loopyrica that I take, driving that distance was a little unsettling. My BFF SIL arranged her schedule to come along and be the Hoke to my Miss Daisy. I couldn't have done this work trip without her. Not only her driving and her extra pair of hands that helped me get around, but her wit, sarcasm, humor and listening ear. I love her!

Thankful for birthday traditions. Our BFF's across the street, with whom our children have grown up with, have taken our Tuffy to Panda Express for dinner for his birthday for, oh, I don't even know how many years now. Sometimes it takes awhile to get us all together what with crazy schedules and all, but tonight was exactly what I needed to come home to.
(and E? Consider this pic your own personal shout out! Love ya)

Did you happen to notice my new blog header? Yeah that one at the top of the page? That comes to you courtesy of one talented Shark. I am thankful that she will do all my creative graphic thingies, and I can just sit back and enjoy them. No......I'm not taking advantage of her. Shush yourself. She is one talented shark eh? I am thankful she takes care of me like that!

And finally, I am thankful for home. I don't mind travel, but this time was particularly hard for me physically. NGL - I hurt by the end of each day. To come home today and lay down on my own bed, surrounded by my dogs and my Splenda, was pure bliss. At home, I have my friends, my routine, my niche. It's like slipping into a pair of snug warm slippers.

So, what are you thankful for today?