Friday, May 27, 2011

Funny Bone Friday - things I may have heard, or said or just thought in my head

Please don't gargle the Sacrament water

The body doesn't do well with death

Lady in pool - "Wow, we really need to wax your back - that's just awful"
Man whom she supposed was her husband -  "Excuse me??"
Lady - *crickets*  "I.....thought....you....were....my.....husband"

Flat Daddy's gonna grab an M-16 and bust a cap on Mother Nature if she doesn't knock it off

Stab and scoop - Stab and scoop

When she gets a UTI - she is naming it Lisa

My sphincter was shy

When I start tasting pee in the back of my throat, we know we have a problem

How's about we don't make out with the dog.

You better believe I am all about opening the red blood cells.

How's about we don't make out with the rock.

It's all fun and games until my maple bar gets dropped.  Then it's death.




11 comments:

Cheeseboy said...

These are funny. Reminds me Tib's. BTW, where is Tib?

gigi said...

Warped, that's what you are and that's why I love you!
Happy Memorial Weekend!

Missy said...

GREAT!!!!
So funny!

tammy said...

I hope that guy waxed his back anyway.

I name all my UTIs "Lisa".

Quit taking all the fun out of making out!

DesertHen said...

LOL..too funny about the lady in the pool!

These are great!

Happy Friday! =)

Connie said...

Why Lisa?

I wonder if the lady in the pool was talking to my husband!

You're too funny!

Amy said...

Love the humor. I am right there about the maple bar.

Garden of Egan said...

I believe you did say all of those things OUT LOUD!
I would love to be a fly on your office wall.

Lisa? UTILisa?

Jillybean said...

Was Lisa the one that dropped your maple bar?

Mrs. Organic said...

THese are all hilarious. And your sphincter one reminds me of a story about Ellie. Kids say the funniest things.

Plain Jame said...

NOT THE MAPLE BAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahaha. Cardinal sin.
Keep it comin!