Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Funny stuff I heard on the way to the office.......

Oh wait - I don't really work.

Just some funny stuff collected over the past several weeks that's prolly only amusing to me.

Corb: "What for lunch?  What does everyone want?"
Chloee: "I could get down on some Subway"

Marine Guard at the gate: "Sir, what is your business on base today?  Where are you going?"
Splenda Daddy: "uuuhhhhh........." *never a good answer when a Marine is in your face and armed with an M16*

Corb: "Wow Chloee, you raced so well, you must be starving, what do you want for lunch?"
Chloee: " I could get down on some oatmeal"

Chloee: "That adorable boy is named Jacob.  He's nice to the teacher like I am"

Luke (reading his birthday card from us and Tuffy at the dinner table with Grandma sitting in): "Happy Birthday my ....nia?....oh Nig!  haha!"
Grandma: "What's a nig?"


Luke and Tuffy at the same time bumbling: "Oh....it's.....a...............nickname.....like.....slang.........joking........means brother"
*note we are NOT racist at my home - the boys are being obnoxious boys*

Speaking of "the game"
Luke:  "Did you SEE that kickers face?  He was so ashamed!  I bet he didn't even take the sacrament today"

Chloee: "Hey Mimi - see that hill way over there?  Up there?  Way over there?............................   That's the middle of nowhere"

Discussing dinner.....
Splenda: "What should we have? Don't you hate this every day?"
Me: "Yes, I do. Worst part of the day"
Splenda: "I hate it worse than you do"
Me: "No you don't. Now make it happen before I end up eating another baggie of cookies as the dogs watch and I have to tell them to stop judging me again"

"Not only is your dog wearing an ascot, but now he's crying.  Wait, the crying has stopped but now he's trying to take off the ascot.  Good thing he lacks opposable thumbs, or I fear he would be successful"

"Stop licking my bed"
"Stop licking my bed"
"Stop licking my bed"
"Stop li......JUST MOVE!"

Splenda: "I'm surprised the Ute flags aren't being flown at half mast after last night's game"


wendy said...

Those were funny. Chloe is pretty entertaining for sure.
I did get a good chuckle over those.
(me) I could get down on some popcorn right now.....
love it

karen said...

I think I could settle in and be right at home with your family.

Amy said...

I love random funnies.

Me: I could get down on some Coca Cola.