Tuesday, March 29, 2011

30 years is a looooong time

30 years ago, on this date, my dad died.

I was 14 and a pissy teenager.

I am now 30 years older, a little bit wiser, and feeling quite nostalgic tonight.

Dad,
  You would be 66.  Retired?  Maybe.  Involved with your family?  Absolutely.

You would be happy for Mom.  She loves her husband and is doing all the things that make her life joyful and fulfilling.  John is good to her and she is peaceful.  They are leaving for Sweden in a few weeks, I think you would be happy for her.

You would be proud of Tod and Terri and all they have accomplished and gone through.  You would appreciate their intelligence, hard work and the kids would make you laugh.  All 6 of them.  You would love every single one of them and all the fun unique things they bring to your posterity.  Alivia and Tayvree would totally have captured your heart.

You would like Dave.  And my boys would have provided you much joy with all the sports they played. You would be proud of Corbin, excited for Luke and so happy for Tuffy.  You would totally dig on Chloee.  She likes all the boys things that you would get into with her.  She is starting T-ball next month.  You would love that.  I like to think that you would be proud of me, my family and our accomplishments. And heaven knows, I could use you and your attorney self right now  : )

You would be so happy for Mindi and her girls.  For her to have her real love story come true and now another baby on the way - you would be thrilled.  Taylor and Addi swim and are so smart and resourceful.  You would be proud of them.

You would be happy for Michelle.  You would be there for her to counsel with, remind her of how much she is loved and cheer her on in every thing she goes for.  I suspect Johnny would be your little shadow.

I imagine family picnics.  Family dinners.  Family pictures.  Yes, we have them, but I like to imagine you with us.  Shooting the bull.  Probably having a beer and sitting back and watching your family with pride.

Perhaps, you are already here, doing just that.

It's been 30 years.  That's a dang long time.  Lot's of life events have come and gone.  And yet, you still managed to be a part of the most important ones.  We know that, we feel you, and even after all this time, we miss you.  Hope you are happy and continue to look down on us with pride, love and joy.

Stay close by - we still need you.

Love,
Your Muppet.

7 comments:

Mae Rae said...

almost made me cry. I miss my dad something aweful sometimes.

this is a very sweet little post

gigi said...

Gosh this was so tender and made me tear up this morning. How proud I know he is of you!

Pedaling said...

I'm sure he's closer than you sometimes realize.

very sweet.
love your nickname.

Ann Marie said...

I cried through this whole post as well. Very teary of course.

I agree with pedaling. I am so very sure he already knows all of this.. as he is with you and all of your family more than you are even aware.

-- Someone said to me.. sometimes the people we lose can do much more for us on the other side.. than they can on this one.
I believe that.

Love ya...

tammy said...

It's a tender mercy for sure to know that our loved ones are still there, closer than we know. I'm sure he's extremely proud of you and loves you. I'm sorry you've had to miss him all these years.

Missy said...

Crying!
This is beautiful!

tiburon said...

Awww this made me cry. And I don't do that. What a sweet tribute to your daddy. :(