Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Why Ostrich's get angry and bury their heads


Setting the stage. 
Monday - first day of 'on call' for work.  Being 'on call' means that when a user has a problem with the software - they call computer support and the ticket gets routed to the 'on call' person.    Otherwise known as the OCP (on call person)

Yearly the major healthcare company requires all employees to change their master IT account passwords.  This change does not waterfall to OCP's particular software, the user must go in and change it manually.

In addition, OCP's software also requires the users to change their passwords yearly.  Users are prompted for 14 days to make the change.

November.   Time for the password changes to begin.  Somehow with all the cold, winter, rain/snow and - oh I don't know - BREATHING, brain cells have begun to disappear.

Beginning at 8:00am Monday morning, a steady stream of tickets have come to the OCP:

"I forgot my password"
"Password reset please"
"Locked out of the system due to too many attempts - requires password reset"

Over, and over, and OVER again.  All.Day.Long.

OCP also has regular work to do.  A big part of which requires annual user security reviews.  Many spreadsheets, much clean up, a lot of work.

Everyone get the picture?

Scene 25 - 6:10pm Monday evening.  OCP person finally leaving the office.  Walks all the way to back door before realizing her umbrella is back upstairs.  Back up the stairs to desk, get umbrella, venture out to the car parked 33 miles away (maybe an exaggeration - maybe not).  Freezing cold, rain, wet roads.
Driving home, gets to major highway and turns south.
Beep-Buzzz
Pager has gone off.  OCP doesn't look since she is driving.  Waits for red light to look.
Beep-Buzz
Warning from pager that it hasn't been acknowledged, but OCP catches the green light.  Roads are wet and slick and doesn't dare take eyes off road to read pager.
Beep-Buzz.
GOSH!!!!  OCP fumbles for pager, reads quickly.  "High Priority.  *Lolly Beatmewithastick @ 8015551234 needs password reset ASAP"
OCP drops pager in her lap in tired disgust and hopes for continued green lights to make commute faster.
Beep-Buzz
OMGOSH!!!!  OCP sneaks look at pager. "High Priority.  Lolly needs call back ASAP!  Pts are waiting!"
COP continues to hit green lights, but commute still slow with wet roads and stupid drivers who don't know how to drive in the rain.
Finally hits a red light.  Finds phone in purse, calls Lolly.  Lolly answers......call dropped.
ARRGGHHHH!!!
OCP calls again.  Gets Lolly.  Lolly is frantic.  Please reset my password!!  OCP explains she is on the road and can do nothing about it until she can get home and get her laptop booted up. Might be another 20 minutes.  Lolly freaks out.  "Isn't there ANY OTHER (insert software name here) person??"
OCP responds, "Nope. Not on call.  Sorry.  I will get you reset as soon as I possibly can"
Lolly is clearly displeased, but realizes there is nothing to be done.

OCP arrives home - almost chokes the dog from barking in her face, gets laptop out and booting up whilst husband and son look at her like she is a mad woman (which she is, but that is beside the point).
OCP's spouse: "Are you hungry?"
OCP: "No, but this has to get to the post office TONIGHT and I need my medication from the pharmacy and I was going to do it all on the way home but instead I got a stupid high priority page!"
OCP's spouse quietly takes the envelop addressed to Marine recruit and quickly slips out the back door.

OCP calls Lolly.  Lolly ecstatic that someone can finally help her.  OCP resets her password and then instructs Lolly to LOG IN WHILE I HOLD!  Lolly attempts.  Can't get  a password.  Tries.  Tries again.  She doesn't have enough letters.  OCP explains AGAIN, the requirements.  Lolly finally gets one.  Confirms it and gets in.  OCP suggests that Lolly right down her password so that she doesn't forget again.

OCP goes into program to close the ticket and reads the complete note taken from computer support.
"User changed password this morning and has now forgotten.  Needs password reset.  Please call ASAP.  Work is stopped"

OCP's jaw drops in unbelief.  Gets out of work clothes and into pajamas.  Spouse calls from pharmacy stating that there is only one rx ready to pick up the other hasn't been approved yet.  The most important one - the one that makes OCP's chest stop hurting and sends her to la-la land for the night cannot be refilled.

OCP cries.  Takes alternate drug.  Climbs in bed, pulls covers up and buries her head.  Goes to bed, knowing that it will be a loooooong week.

And now you know.

*Names have been changed to protect the idiot innocent.

13 comments:

Vanessa said...

I have a great idea. Why don't they jot their passwords down on a post it?

Just an idea.

CountessLaurie said...

I am gonna beat Lolly with a stick. You had 14 days, Lolly, so why is this MY emergency at 6pm? Poor Lolly. Probably doesn't even know she is an idiot.

Hope you got some nice sleeps in dreamsville...

Martha H. said...

I just want to smack some of our users. Seriously! You changed your password. It's not OUR jobs to remember YOUR new password. There are no words for some people's stupidity.

Jamie said...

Dear Lolly,
Meat me by the bike rack.....seriously???

Scrappy Girl said...

I couldn't get past the hideous ostrich pic...those have to be the scariest animal alive. Yuck.

Hope things look better soon.

Jillybean said...

So will you actually be beating Lolly with a stick? Perhaps you could tatoo her password onto the back of her hand?

tammy said...

Could you please just memorize everyone's passwords from now on, and give them a personal phone call reminding them every day? I mean how are they supposed to remember it?

Mae Rae said...

for three years i was the admin for a department of a healthcare facility. i reminded them and reminded them...

i think the higher the education the less the brain cells actually work.

or maybe it is just me.

Missy said...

Can you set their passwords to something like "dumbass?"

Pedaling said...

The last sentence.....I am laughing-

and Missy's comment gave me a chuckle too--actually all the comments were pretty funny.

alpinekleins said...

Man! I'm so sorry! I'm the person on the other end - constantly clicking on the "forgot my passwork" button! I'll be thinking of you next time ;)

Kristin

Amy said...

I get requests for password reset's daily. They usually go something like this:
"Sakshi is getting an error when logging in to CMS."

ME:Hmm what server? There are at least 30 possibilities.

E-mail sent to user of "urgent" password issue. "Sakshi, what is the IP address of the CMS server you are trying to access?"

A day later..."Thank you Amy. My server is 1.1.1.1"

Immediate response from me "Your password has been reset. You will need to leave the password field blank when you log in again.'

The following day. "Thank you, Amy. Blank is not being accepted as the password. I have submitted another ticket 000000. Please resolve ASAP so that I may do the following task....yada yada."

I hate password resets. Evil, evil, evil!

CB said...

Lolly needs a head butt@!