Public vs Private

I started blogging 2 and half years ago.  It's been a journey.  I had my BFF the Shark help me build my site and then as I have played around with it, I've added this, deleted that, modified stuff - generally done what made me happy.  It was MY blog after all, my own little space on the www that I could journal, share my feelings, vent, attempt to be funny, share stories and keep my family and friends up to date on all our latest doings.  I made it public, because it is a great way to network with others and I have made some incredible friendships through it. 

It was great during Luke's mission.  The entire family could easily read his letters and stay in touch with him.

It's been fantastic during Corbin's USMC experience.  Not having much experience first hand with military life, it's been fun documenting his journey and I am hoping it will be a fun thing to go back and read as time goes on.

It's been fun to go back and look at my old posts.  Where our family was at, what we were doing and what we are up to now.  My how things change in such a quick time.  A blink of an eye really.

With being public however, you also open yourself up to whatever comments someone chooses to make.  Even with comment moderation on, you still see the writers words as those comments hit your email box and sometimes people are just mean.  Things are said that are hurtful.  A lot of time it feels unfair.  Especially if they don't even know you, but still have a perception of you.  And while it's always fun to see new followers.  When you try to link back and check them out and you can't, that is always and uneasy feeling.  Creepy, more like.  But, that is the consequences of a public blog.

After a lot of thought, and counsel with someone smarter than me, I have made the decision to go back public.  Private was miserable.  In just the short time I was, I lost contact with friends.  No blame anywhere, it's just hard to remember to stay on top of private blogs.  That's the fact.   Blogging makes me happy.  Networking with my friends and chatting via blog comments or emails make me happy.  I don't want to lose that.  In fact, as a human being who is just as valuable and worthwhile as the next one, I think I deserve to do something that makes me happy. 

So, with some mild trepidation, I am venturing back out into the public arena.  I fully expect some nastiness, and really, that's okay.  I have reconciled myself to the fact that people are people and sometimes no matter what I may say or do, their perceptions of me are set.  'sokay.  Just as I am entitled to my belief's, other people are as well.   The bottom line is I can live with myself.  I know who I am.  I know what I am about.  I know what is in my heart.  And those who are my true friends know the same.  I have no doubt that just as I am loyal to my large circle of BFF's, I have many that are just as loyal back to me.  Maybe not everyone, and that's their prerogative, but I know that those who truly matter are there for me.  They are the ones who subscribe to receive follow up comments and then respond back to the mean ones so I don't have to.  They are the ones, who defend, correct others and believe in me.  To those of you, I say, thanks for not sucking as a friend!

And - so here we go............