Top 10 Indicators that your employer has changed to Obama's Health Care plan

BFC sent this to me a couple of days ago.....I am STILL giggling!

The Top 10 Indicators that your employer has changed to Obama's Health Care plan:

(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

(9) Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."

(8) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

(7) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

(6) The only item listed under Preventative Care Coverage is "an apple a day."

(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.

(4) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges," is not a typographical error.

(3) The only expense covered 100% is…. "Embalming."

(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED OBAMA'S HEALTH CARE PLAN:

(1) You ask for Viagra, and they give you a Popsicle stick and duct tape!!!!!

Tickle Me Pink Tuesday - Part II

Besties. Who are funny.

Tickle Me Pink Tuesday - illustrated version......

Best.Corn.Ever.
One bite and you will never be the same. For reals.

The.End.

Missionary Monday - update

(old picture)

Parents,

Hey mom and dad, how are you guys doing? I am doing great here in CHILE!!! This week went flying by as normal, and I really am caught up in a bunch of work here. I was really glad to get your letters and the pics that you guys sent to me! Oh and thank you guys so much for sending me the debit card. I really am in need of that. Sorry that I lost it! I will try not to let it happen again.
Okay, to start off I would just like to give you guys a heads up on the time that I have left here… Every transfer, as you guys know is 6 weeks. There are transfers at the end of August. After this transfer there are only 3 transfers left!! This means the following… This next transfer I will be getting a letter (its called the Moroni Letter) which tells me that I should get ready to pack the bags… There is like a slip thing that I am supposed to fill out with some information. I am not really sure what is on the slip, I have only seen like 2 letters, but I will be getting that this next transfer… I really don’t have that much time left!!!!
Thanks for sending the package! I will be looking forward to getting that. Also I just wanted to say congrats to you guys for…. RUNNING A 5K TOGETHER. Like I have always said, I honestly just feel tired thinking about running that long. I run from one block to the other, and I am beat! Things are going great with me and my comp. We get along great and the District Leaders are great too. One of them is Elder Sumrall. Maybe you have heard of his Dad on the news, but he is the son of Theodore Sumrall, who is being charged of robbing money to do a study of energy or something like that. Its kinda weird, but I felt bad for him cause he is getting letters of how is dad is doing in prison.
Okay, enough of that. Dad, sounds good to me that you guys are going to go on a scout camp. I don’t know if I told you guys, but there is scouts here in Chile. It is a little bit different than what we do at the house, and how it works, but it is kinda the same in a way. They also have scout camps too. Kinda cool. Also mom wanted to wish you a happy birthday!!!! I would send you something, but… I am afraid that it will get lost or stolen L HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!! Oh by the way dad, I didn’t eat a Mickey D´s I think that we are going to go today. The problem is that it is really expensive! The Bigmac is like 6 bucks!! Kinda crappy but whatever. There is another restaurant that we eat at called Shopdog! It’s a hotdog place and is really good!
I miss you guys and love you. We should have some baptisms this month if all goes well! Love you guys !!

Elder Catmull


Tuffy,

What is going on dude! Good to hear from ya this week dude. I know can you bieve that I only have 5 months left here in the mish? 5 months is like nothing dude. Before you know it, I will be playing a game if G.O.W. with ya Sat morning eating some Fruit Loops!! YEAH! Anyway I am loving the mish dude, you don’t even know how awesome it is. I could try all day to try and explain it through internet, but it wont be the same. There are some great stories that I want to tell you guys too when I get back. Keeping up the Rock Band stuff? That is pretty sweet! I am not going to lie you to, the other day I saw a pic of you on the 4 wheeler and dude, you are huge man. You really are getting big. I on the other hand…..am not getting any bigger. I am just staying the same as always. I guess I deserve that cause I am not doing any kind of exercise. Keep up the good work man. I miss ya and love ya.

Elder Catmull

Spiritual Sunday

In my church, the first Sunday of each month is set aside and designated as Fast Sunday. It is an opportunity for members to participate in fasting for 24 hours (two meals). This means going without food or water. Click here to read more.

The main meeting of the day is our Sacrament meeting, and on Fast Sunday's, it is also the opportunity for members of the congregation to bear their own personal testimonies of gospel principles. It's a time to share insight, express gratitude, but most importantly testify of principles or commandments that one has come to gain a personal knowledge of or has been strenghtened by obedience. Kinda like open mike night.

Usually while fasting each individual focuses their prayers and meditation on something or someone specific. Whether it is a need in their own life, or in behalf of someone else. It makes one's fast more meaningful and we believe it demonstrates faith and builds one's individual relationship with their Maker. It also humbles us physically and spiritually to be in the right frame of mind and Spirit to participate in testimony meeting.

Today, our family included some yet-to-be-born grandchildren of some dear friends in our fast. Ava and Aden are due later this year, but it has been discovered that Ava has a fatal heart condition that if she is lucky enough to be born alive, will require surgery and the projected outcome is not favorable. We are hoping for a miracle if that is what the Lord has in mind. So, as I went to church this morning, my mind was full of thoughts of them, our friends, and some other issues that have my heart a little heavy right now.

Our sacrament portion went by in it's usual reverent manner, which completely set the tone for the whole rest of the meeting. As members began to approach the podium to share their testimonies, I realized that as we were nearing out of time, every single person who had shared so far was a man. Very unusual. And yet, everyone of them had something very powerful to say. It was a unique and wonderful meeting.

I was particularly touched by a young man from a family that Splenda home teaches. He is the same age as my Elder L. Single Mom, great family, great kids. When this young man turned 18, he enlisted in the Marine corps. He did his basic training, and then received special permission to return to civilian life to serve a two year mission. However, as he got ready to turn his paperwork in, circumstances changed and he was no longer allowed this privilege.

He leaves today for deployment to Afghanistan. He took the opportunity this morning to share some thoughts with his ward family before leaving. He told us of a wonderful experience he just had. Elder L. Tom Perry, a leader in our church, visited with his ready-to-depart company, spoke to them and then left them with a blessing. This young man's feelings were tender to be sure, and as he expressed them to us, he also mentioned the fact that as he looked around the congregation, he saw the same level of priesthood that the apostle, Elder Perry had. He made the point that we have, right at our fingertips, the same healing, comforting power of the priesthood that Jesus Christ did in his day. I was touched, humbled and filled with gratitude for something I often take for granted. I knew in that instant that all the things weighing on my mind and heart right now, are going to work out. The way they are supposed to, maybe not the way I would like them to.

I thought of our young friend going home after the meeting, finishing up his packing, and heading out. I thought of his good-byes to his sweet Mother, and siblings. Of how he might feel boarding that plane to take him straight into harm's way. Is he afraid? Is he nervous? Does he feel lonely? Does he wonder if he'll come home? OR.....does his testimony of the things he shared overshadow those worries? Is that strong enough to dispel the fear of the unknown? I like to think so.

I wanted to send a quick note to him before he left and as I was writing a few thoughts to him, this specific impression occur ed to me. While he didn't get the opportunity to serve a proselyting mission in the traditional sense that our young men do in our church. He is nevertheless, serving a mission. His uniform won't be a white shirt, tie and namebadge. Instead it will be camo fatigues, a flak jacket and his ever present weapon. However, their purposes are the same.

One key principle our religion is based on is free agency. While my Elder L is out preaching the gospel and helping others find happiness in it's principles, thus preaching free agency if you will, this young man is doing likewise - serving and sacrificing for the principle of free agency. Same mission, different circumstances. Both of equal value to the Lord.

So I started thinking again of our young friend. I picture him squaring his shoulders as he grabs his duffel bag, jutting his lower jaw out just a tich. Head held high, eyes forward and chest lifted. He's on his mission and an admirable one at that. My thoughts and prayers will be with his family, with him and utmost for his safe return.

Happy moments this week....Sissy, boys, and missionaries

Sissy taking a break from swimming to snack and munch. We have our priorities....

Kasey's biopsy came back. Yes, it was a mast cell tumor. Grade 2. BUT, they got it all. He's good to go! Can't do the big collar around his neck to keep him from licking and biting out the stitches, but this shirt does nicely. Big dork!


Tuffy taught Sissy how to drink milk.


Band of brothers. My boys have besties. And they are BESTIES. As thick as thieves these boys are. So when Elder M serving in Australia writes home, he sends them all in one envelope to my house addressed to them with my last name. I love him! I love them. All of them!

But my favorite thing of all this week? This....(click to enlarge and read) We are so happy for our missionary and yes, proud of him too. He has always been blessed with leadership skills. Quiet, by example and with humor. I am not surprised that the Lord is utilizing those talents.

Intermountain Healthcare 5k Run/Walk - Splenda's first race!

Intermountain Healthcare's 6th Annual Cardiovascular/Pulmonary 5k Run/Walk

This event was a free offering to employee's, patients, and their families. Seeing as how our oldest son C works in that department, and Splenda is a patient, we decided this would be a fun one to do together.

Now for me, a 5k is, well, a quick run that allows me to train sprinting. For Splenda, it's a different story. Splenda, Splenda, Splenda. Can eat whatever he wants and ALWAYS looks hawt! Doesn't need to do a stitch of exercise, yet his body is rockin. If he were a girl, I would hate him!

I kept reminding him that he better start doing some training of some sort for this. Oh, I don't know, maybe a little running? Maybe a little more than walking the dogs in the neighborhood or a few miles on his bike? Every so often for the past couple of months, I've been nagging, er....reminding him that he ought to start working towards this.

Don't get me wrong. He was thinking about it all right. But you kind of have to understand something. Splenda no likey exercise. Specifically, running. Splenda only likes exercise if he happens to be doing something that doesn't seem like exercise. Like playing racquetball, or basketball, or pedaling around leisurely on his bike. I know, I don't get it. But whatever.

So his training amounted to basically just that. Some dog walking. Some bike riding. I think he actually ran around the corner once to the neighbor's about some scout stuff, but really, that's about it. I gave up nagging, er....reminding, and figured, he's a big boy, he'll work it out. Truth be told. I figured he would get halfway around the park the first loop, have some lung pain, lose his air and he would be done. BUT..... I was really excited we were doing something together! That was truly enough for me.

I started off the morning with a quick 20 mile bike ride with the Shark and her buddy R. 3.2 miles is not enough of a work out, and we have a BIG bike ride next weekend, so getting some cycling miles in was a good plan. Of course, we could have been quicker if it wasn't for the flat tire the Shark had. And to make it even more interesting, while she and R worked on changing it, we all smelled pot. Yep. POT. WTC? Who smokes pot at 6am on Saturday morning???

When I got home, I woke up Splenda and we got ready to go. We headed to Sugarhouse park in his beautiful pony and while he drove, I offered some very unsolicited tips. How to run downhill, how to warm up and stretch. He humored me and made eye contact every once in awhile to appear that he was listening. I get that. It's our M.O.

We checked in, got our sticky name badges with a number and then headed to the start line with everyone else. We had some time to stretch, warm up, and loosen a bit, before the horn finally sounded.

I, of course, was right at the start line. We all know how I feel about that. Splenda chose to stay in the back. He was "afraid of being trampled by people getting past him."

We start off down hill, level out, then back up. Level out, then back down, level out. And then repeat the entire loop again. On the second loop, you take it down the first hill and then turn into the finish line. As I turned in, I kicked it up and sprinted. Felt fantastic for about 90 seconds. Ruh Ro!! The finish line is further away than I thought! Started the final sprint too quick. Dying. Sputtering. Gasping. Find.one.last.push......finally cross and am given my time.

I have watched ahead of me and knew I was the 3rd woman in. The first two were 20-somethings that totally kicked my trash. I threw my name badge in the box for the raffle and headed back out in reverse order to find Splenda.

I slowly trot the course backwards, and begin wondering what has happened. I should see him by now. Where is he? Finally at the top of the hill, I spot him! He is walking and not walking normal. CRAP! I meet up with him and he tells me his frickin knees are killing him! He shows me where the pain is, describes it, we discuss it at length, while still moving, and wouldn't you know it! IT band issue for the Splenda! Double crap!!

He's no quitter though. He had barely let up when I found him and while he was in terrible pain, he picked it back up and we ran the rest of the way in. OMGosh!! I can't even tell you how fun it was to run with him! I so wish he could learn to love it. But, I understand it's not for everyone. I also knew that I will never get him back out on a race course, so I was soaking it in and enjoying every step with him.

We cross the finish line and they give him his time. WTC?!?!?! Splenda!! You are amazing! I am so proud of you!

We head to the pavilion for breakfast, water, stretching, raffle give away's (we are losers) and then finally back to the pony for the ride home. NGL - he was regretting for a nanosecond having to drive a stick shift. That dang clutch!

Final stats?

Splenda
Time: 38:02 Yes! No typo there kids, he kicked it!

Me
Time: 25:32 Not my fastest, but faster than this same event last year. I'll take it.
Roadkills: I refused to count.

Let me explain why.......this event is personal. It is held primarily for cardio/pulmonary patients. Every single person running or walking has a story. Whether it is a family member dealing with a disease or condition, or they are caretakers in the professional realm, or they are patients themselves. They might be struggling with heart disease, be a heart transplant recipient or donor. It might be on the pulmonary side. Pulmonary Fibrosis, Emphysema, Lung transplant or recipient, Cystic Fibrosis. There are so many conditions that are life altering and/or unfortunately life ending. Every person there is touched in some way with some facet of the heart and/or lungs and the different diseases and conditions they can present with. My own Splenda has been diagnosed with early onset Emphysema.

As I watched the runners and walkers come in, I could not help but be touched. I watched an elderly gentleman who was clearly a patient himself, walk his way around that park for the full 5k. It was hard for him. I could see it in his face, I could hear it in his breath. But he did it. That inspires me.

I saw an entire family with matching T-shirts that had a picture of their father/grandpa that said "We love Doyle." I don't know their story, but I was touched at their show of love, support and family solidarity.

I watched my Splenda, who we really thought would struggle with his lungs, battle his damn knees and NOT.QUIT. That, my friends, is why I refuse to count road kills in the event. Instead I wished I would have counted all the living, breathing, heartbeating folks who inspired me.

All that is left is a few questions........

Will Intermountain continue to sponsor this great event? I sure hope so.
Will Splenda ever do another running event? Doubtful
Will I cherish the fun we had this morning together? For the rest of my life and beyond.

**For the record. Splenda is not moving well. Not well at all. Wish I could video tape it. Picture Frankenstein lumbering along not bending his knees! I only laugh WITH HIM cause I know 'zactly how he feels!**